Is technology killing your relationship?

*** Warning – strong one sided personal opinions ***

Are you like me and HATE how technology has come between you and your partner (and children)? How it’s inveigled itself into your conversation ( or now lack of it). How they check their screens all the time, dive on it when it buzzes. Run upstairs when it beeps – enough to just about break a  leg.

According to The Glendon Association we spend “about nine and a half hours a day listening to music, emailing, texting, instant messaging, Facebooking, Twittering, surfing” and almost anything you can think of besides really communicating. The group cites the constant stimulation as a reason why we push out, “deep intimacy,” for an alternate reality.

That would explain why my OH would rather tap his screen for 2 hours playing a game, than talk to me.  Whilst I think I may be stimulating, obviously I’m not constantly and instantly stimulating ( a lot to live up to I recon) and the mobile game is.

I could maybe get him to talk to me , and every time he actually looked at me and engaged in conversation, I could hand him a imaginary ‘bonus’ – like the games do.  He could work towards level 2 – where he got some harder task to accomplish!  And the ultimate level 30000000000  – Iwould designate tap zones on my body ( I thought I had), and dole out fictitious rewards to him as he taps them. “Oh no honey, you don’t actually GET sex, you just enjoy pretending you may.  — Keep tapping!”

It may just be me, ( I seriously doubt that), but  I’d rather talk to a stranger than stare at my phone screen waiting for a text message or scrolling through my email, and while I understand  it is much easier to stare blankly at a screen than to get up the courage to break out of the tangled Web, and actually form a real life bond with a person in the flesh, I have to believe that your life is enriched by doing the latter.

When you are talking to your Other Half (OH) and they are staring at a screen whilst you talk – what does that say?

  1. I can’t be bothered to look at you and hear you
  2. My screen has more interesting stuff on it
  3. I really am just getting 30 % of what you say, but that’s good enough for me. Seeing as just about every male OH will tell you they can’t multi-task, you must assume the same goes for listening to someone whilst negotiating a screen.

Although we brag about how globally interconnected we are through technology, if we live our life through technology  then I believe  we truly are alone.

Many people you may never actually meet – could you really call them friends?????  Maybe I can coin a new word for this relationship called ‘friendology’. Not real relationships with real people, rather a  perceived relationship that comes out of a use of technology base.

Reach out to the people around you, they might be longing for that deep, personal connection rather than a web-based one. If you do that, perhaps you’ll use technology to enrich peoples lives,  rather than become  your only life.

I’m not the only one that thinks this ….

Comments please……

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